Bless their hearts

My son, 16, got his license today. His real one, the kind where you don't have to have your mum the backseat driver bugging you about leaving more distance between your car and the one ahead or unfurling impromptu lectures about the dangers of drinking or doing ANYTHING while driving or drinking, PERIOD.

Bless his pea-picking heart.

There's a spring in his step. He didn't whine about a single chore. If he could whistle while brushing his teeth, he'd do it. He's standing up straighter -- he looks to be about a head taller, five-foot-ten and hoping for an even six foot. Every teenaged pore seems to ooze the news -- he's not a kid any more.

Bless his heart.

He's already got plans for souping up his inherited 2000 Chevy with a better sound system that fits his iPod. The car's maroon, like the school colors, like his letter jacket with the fuzzy tennis rackets that says "District Boys Singles Champion" in maroon embroidery on the grey field -- the one that he wears even with shorts in the Texas heat despites its felt and its maroon leather.
In his spare moments, Patrick's reading the book I bought him called "So You Want To Be A Doctor" -- the medical field has captured his imagination after watching every single possible episode of the family's favorite show, House M.D. He's loaded his school schedule with every possible AP class and science and math, and he's making A's in every one of them, having connected the dots between grades and money for a bio-chemistry major.

And while the snarling, sneering monster of teenagedom rears its nasty head on occasions that are getting rarer all the time, little outbursts of sarcasm tinged with his own intelligent way of looking at the world he's rapidly growing up to, I see him purposefully striding toward adult status and navigating his way around the obstacles of temptation that so easily beset today's youth.

I remember the fair-haired, blue-eyed child of a dozen years ago, how he was so sweet-looking and irresistible that total strangers wanted to pat his head, the days when he starred as Ralphie Parker in the Ennis Public Theatre production of A Christmas Story. The time we were at the movies and an elderly gentleman came up to Patrick and patted his head, right there in front of us, and said "Looks like such a nice intelligent boy," and walked away.

I remember all those things and like Mary, I ponder them in my heart. and I think, Bless his heart.

I interviewed Sam and Kathy Harrell yesterday. Sam's one of the winningest coaches in Texas high school football history -- he coached the maroon boys, the Ennis Lions, to three state championships between 2000 and 2005.

And out of those Friday night lights, the most promising player to emerge to date was his son, quarterback Graham. Up for a possible Heisman, the Texas Tech Red Raider record-breaker is being courted for NFL stardom by a flock of Jerry Maguires.

Who knew?

When the Harrells recently moved into a new home in Ennis’ Oak Creek subdivision, Kathy ran across her son Graham’s favorite poster from his childhood days.

It was the shape of things to come.

At the bottom of the huge picture of Joe Montana, the fourth-grader and future Texas Tech record-setting quarterback had stuck a home-made label that read: “Graham Harrell – the next Joe Montana.”

“I remember thinking, ‘Bless his heart, he thinks he can play in the NFL!’ I didn’t want to burst his bubble, but I kind of felt a little hurt for him,” Kathy Harrell said, unconsciously putting her hand up to her heart.

To her credit, she didn't smack him down and put him in his place, nor did she take the opposite stance of hero-worship. At every stage, the Harrell have enjoyed their son's successes, without getting caught up in the idea that -- lo, and behold -- has come to pass.

Little Graham Harrell is all grown up, a dozen years later, standing within reach of that boyhood goal. He’s the nation's leading passer with 393.4 yards per game, moving into fourth place on the NCAA career passing yardage list with 13,829 yards. He has set school career marks in touchdown passes (117) and career touchdowns responsible for (129) and is the nation's active leader in both categories.

And pretty doggone sweet and unspoiled still, for all of it.

All's I'm saying is, sometimes you never know.

Bless our children's hearts.

Missteps in the American education system?

Okay, so I got a little ticked off when I heard posters on mediabistro.com berating the American education system.

As the wife of an educator and a sometime education writer for Texas School Business and The Dallas Morning News among others, I'd have to say most American schools and educators are doing a great job of educating a very socioeconomically diverse generation. In the U.S., everyone gets an education. Granted it's better in some places -- your tax dollars at work, higher concentrations of literate parents raising kids in print-rich environments, parents whose incomes enable their kids to go to school on a full belly in the morning and in decent clothes. Those are huge advantages, right there.

Someone protested on the same board about school efforts to teach morals. I say they're a sign of the times, perhaps, and maybe a response to some of the terrible news about bullies and kids without scruples. And if parents are falling down on the job or too busy to do it, the schools do need to step in.

Complaints about renewed emphasis on phys ed? Surely, reviving PE curriculum is a response, and not a kneejerk one, to American homes turning out chunky latchkey kids who sit in front of the TV/computer/video game in lieu of family involvement or good babysitter. And afterschool programs that keep kids active and supervised would be a big step in the right direction.

With all this, a protest that in some schools economics is being phased out or made an elective? While I'd definitely say economics is an essential, I'd also like to see SAT/standardized test prep courses essential for kids who are passing, and tutoring courses essential for those who are not.

For people with as much education as they have, teachers are not lavishly paid, as some retorted. And with an increased emphasis on accountability, administrators are under a lot of pressure and their salaries are modest for their doctoral-level educations, compared the huge amounts lavished upon their counterparts in industry.

That said, there are some real dud educators out there, and if school systems weren't so desperate for educators, those bad apples wouldn't find a place at the chalkboard, living proof that good teachers couldn't possibly be overpaid because they're in short supply.

Education aside, it is certainly the parents' role to teach checkbook management, morals, ethics, reproductive essentials, faith, love of reading, early literacy, and to help their child develop their gifts.

I had someone tell me recently that it wasn't normal for parents to do all those things, that is the school's responsibility.

I don't think so.

Here's the thread on mediabistro I'm ranting about: http://mediabistro.com/bbs/cache/t38970_1.asp